Happy Birthday to me!


We all have birthdays.  Some of us are more accepting of them than others.  I'm usually okay with them,  really, I am.

I'm convincing you, right?

The truth is the past few years of my early thirties have brought me a lot of clarity.  I spent so much of my twenties wondering who I would become, worrying about the future and quite frankly, living a very self indulgent lifestyle.

My early thirties forced me to give up some of those self indulgent ways and much of that had to do with becoming a wife and mother.  It was a hard transition but it was the best thing to ever happen to me.  It required me to be a better person.  There was no other option.  I also put my career on hold, which tinkered with my confidence.  But with each passing year, my confidence in that decision and as a mother grows.  When I look back on my younger self, the transformation is really quite remarkable.  Do any of you ever feel this way when you reflect on the last 5, 10, 15 years of your life?

There are other light-bulb moments of my early thirties such as learning to let go of things, like the unproductive and anxious thoughts that haunted my younger years. They were like poison to me.

And then there's wisdom.  Precious, valuable wisdom.  I still have a long way to go with this one but I'm recognizing that each year grants me a little bit more.  I realize now that perfection is not reality and it's okay that I don't have all the answers.  I'm learning to admit when I'm wrong, say I'm sorry and that changing my mind is not a sign of weakness.

And then there's that huge thing we women refer to as "doing it all."  Yes, I've pondered over this one so many times.  Is it possible?  Is it necessary?  My conclusion.  Who cares?  My thirties have been a time of just being.  Being present, being happy and listening to myself.  I've finally convinced myself it's okay to just be.  That idea of proving myself is gone.  Once I let go of self doubt and judgment, I found a happy and grateful heart capable of so much more than I ever imagined in my younger years.

I turn 35 today, just in case you were wondering.  And yes, I still have a few self indulgent bones left in my body so I'll be spending the first half of the day doing "me" things and the later part of the day with the family hanging out at home.  It's really a great place to be.



17 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday - may you have a beautiful day and year to come!

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  2. I love this post. Thank you for sharing. I hope you have a wonderful birthday filled with all the people, places, and things you love the most. Enjoy! :)
    Happy Birthday,
    Sara

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  3. Happy Birthday Amy! We are the same age.

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  4. Please... you are only 35, write a post like this when you are 45:)

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  5. Happy birthday! Such a beautiful post. I have some of the same thoughts and have worried about some of the same things, so I can relate! I hope you have a great day!

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  6. What a lovely picture and post! Happy birthday to you!

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  7. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I hope you have had a wonderful day

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  8. Happy Birthday Amy!! I sure hope my thirties are clarity for me! I'm the same way with trying to find myself. Good to know I have a lot of things to look forward to :)

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  9. Happy Birthday Amy!!! I hope you have had a great day! It's good to know I have a lot of good things to look forward to in my thirties (I will be there next year!) I'm the same way with trying to find myself and I hope I get there eventually :)

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  10. Happy birthday, hope it was wonderful!!

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  11. Thank you everyone! Your sweet comments made today extra special. It really means a lot to me.

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  12. So sorry that this is a day late but I also want to wish you the happiest of birthdays. I agree that my early 30's are awesome. I like them more than my 20's because I've let go of what other people think. I wear my winter crocs in public and own every minute of it. I hope this year brings much health and happiness!!

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  13. I hope you had the most amazing birthday!!!!!

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  14. I waited a few days to get my thoughts together about this post, because I loved so much about it! I definitely relate to your thoughts as I was thinking recently about my "old" blog...it was still me, but in those 3 years I have learned so much. I have many friends that are your age and have told me how much better life is when you gain the wisdom and understanding about yourself that you are talking about. I hope you had a fabulous day!

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  15. So sorry this is belated...HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AMY! Hope it's a truly amazing year for you! xoxoxo

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